From "Yet Another Metrobus Tragedy Edition"

DCist Morning Roundup: Yet Another Metrobus Tragedy Edition

If you think DC's streets are a bloodbath of Peckinpaghian proportions, just wait until Mary Cheh gets rid of all the speed bumps in town. In addition to being in bed with the CHUD and Morlock lobby, Mary Cheh continues to function as an apologist for lunatic suburban drivers, well known to be the Devil incarnate. Speed bumps, like "Deaf Child," "Baby on Board," and "Under New Management" signs, are proven to have saved billions of lives every year. Yet Mary Cheh, along with her subterranean cannibal and troglodyte overlords from the future, want to wind the clock back to that ghastly time when people payed attention to speed limits and Klingle Valley was the exclusive dominion of the horse and buggy carriage trade. Now, it's it's a decrepit culvert fit only for hobos, lepers, and surprise-surprise...CHUDs who've had their drivers licenses suspended. Why does Mary Cheh hate streetlights, safety, and our children? Why does she want to get rid of speed bumps and plunge the earth into a Second Darkness?

I'll tell you why. Something festers in the heart of Ward 3. Something that you have failed to see. But the Great Goatse has seen it. His Brown Eye penetrates stone, air, flesh, and press releases. Even now, he presses his advantage. You are all going to die! Slowly, and it's going to smell really bad! What is the City Council but a thatched barn where brigands drink in the reek and their brats roll on the floor with the dogs? The victory of the Insurance Claims Consumer Protection Amendment Act of 2009 does not belong to you, Cheh CHUDmaster! You are a lesser daughter of greater sires!

When given the choice between corrupt and stupid, choose stupid. Unless you're stupid, in which case, choose Jif.

This reminds me of the old Virginia Woolf quote, "Bi, gay, straight...too bad there aren't any good choices."